This is my..DeAth Note

●Dear● -Dead- ●Diary● ♥♥♥

This is a story of me, my life and my experience.
I'm MIcheLlE.
I am not held responsible for any forms of vulgar comments and personal opinions in this blog.
Read it at your own risk, by all means,
If you find it offensive and inappropriate,
Dear you, just simple, DON'T read.

~P.E.r.I.o.d~

(Monday, February 11, 2008-)
+7:18 PM]*

# -

Oh my.....I need mercy!!

It's been almost a month working now... I can say I'm really exhausted... tired... sleepy.. I felt like I can tumble down anytime, anywhere. Not only that, I got to stand for about 7-10 hours daily... non-stop working and sigh...

My trainers are now more aggresive. Hence, for every mistake I've done like for an instance drinks... They'll ask me to redo it again... For everything that I did wrong, or didn't do.. they'll raised up their voice to make sure I'm adhearing to what they are gonna say. Well well well.... I felt like giving it all up at once, twice or maybe three times. Sometimes they expect me to know, and berated about me being slow... But I can't help it. For every ounce of juice for some drinks I gotta use measuring cup to ensure I got the right amount. Yeah, I know I am slow. But what am I to do when I need to measure every little single thing, open my bible of drinks and ensure everything is all fine???

I am not a robot nor feelingless. Sometimes the expectations they set are too high for me to reach. It's only been like less than a month... I can't know everything. I can't assume I'm right. I can't talk to them back telling you all shouldn't be expecting so much out of me. Whenever they asked something I don't know... eg. waiter.. they'll be like.."har? You don't know??"

And then today one of the trainers nagged about the servers lazing around at the service bar. Not only the server at fault... Bartenders are at fault too! Cause we're suppose to shoo them out if they are there for quite long... Hmmph. For nothing only we bartenders got berated...Not like we laze around also.. ?@?@$%?^$&&%*!!!

Hey. Excuse me man... I'm only human. And yeah, the trainers expect me to multitask... when I don't even have the ability now. I only got 2 hands, 2 legs. Haih... sometimes because of this I felt like giving up lah.

But no, I need to endure this. I know I'm doing this for someone. I must not let her down. I must ensure I'm able to cope with everything and anything. I need strength, courage and determination to get through this. Gambateh Michelle.

Heart full of pain,
There's nothing to gain,
Head filled with stress,
Everything's gonna be a mess,
But I must not let it rest,
Because I need to be the best!

(Copyright 2008-Michelle-)

2 .deaths.
And the story ends like this...period.
By: M i c [ H e L L ] e .
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