This is a story of me, my life and my experience.
I'm MIcheLlE.
I am not held responsible for any forms of vulgar comments and personal opinions in this blog.
Read it at your own risk, by all means,
If you find it offensive and inappropriate,
Dear you, just simple, DON'T read.
~P.E.r.I.o.d~
(Sunday, January 11, 2009-)
+12:00 AM]*
# -
Ever like a person before?
I'm sure you did. If not you're pretty stoned.
What if you like someone, for let say.. about 3 years...
This is something personal that I would like to share.. Since it doesn't really matter anymore. Hence, I've decided to post this up.
Have you ever like someone secretly for 3 years but not giving a hint on him/her?
Have you ever been into a relationship just to forget something about him/her?
Have you ever hurt that someone and call it off just because the one you like remembers you and asking about you through a third party?
My answer to all of those is merely yes. I'm deeply apologizing for that someone here... Who've gone through thick and thin with me, with my tantrums and feelingless-ness. If you ever see this, I'm truly deeply madly sorry....This post is to show you how sorry I am to you...
Well, it's been 5 years now... And today, out of the blue while I was checking my facebook, I saw some pictures of that particular person.. let's call him 'H' . He's not even close to me whatsoever. I used to play with him in an online game..and that is where it began. I saw him before too. He's nice to me ...and He's in my college before, I saw him, and I ignored. I pretend not to know him, not to see him. I guess he's doing the same to me. Why ar? I also dono. I know I'm pretty shy and hate him for making me feeling this way but he's innocent!! And I told and asked my friends about him. Some say he's not bad, some say his friends are better. Lolz. I mean regarding the looks. FYI, he has some handsome pretty boy look.
It was dreadful you know, I was morbid for a moment. I can recall myself writing up poems, those sad ones... and longing for his presence. Sigh, and I sighed hard. I was still thinking of him no matter where and when, how and I'm pretty sure he's moving on and I was still stucking there at the same spot, not moving anywhere ahead. I Stopped and stared, but I'm moving no where.
He started to ignore me, and I started to hate him, yet I couldn't. Every little single thing that has gotta do with that 'H' is like. URGH. Again it makes me wonder how is he doing and all.. Has he been out there tackling girls? has he had feelings towards anyone? And I heard from someone that he told them I'm ugly. That's when it started that I'm always finding myself unattractive, and ugly, even up to now.
Oh well, those 3 years was so hard for me to move on.. I can't seem to like anyone and I can't seem to look at guys because I had sosoSoso low self esteem, and I don't know whether to blame him for that or not.. but I'm seriously down on the ground... kneeling.. dreading.. thinking what is life... or will I ever fall in love again...
So then now I knew he's occupied, In other words. having a girlfriend. Well, I'm happy for him really. He deserved one. He really do. I'm the one clapping on one hand instead of two. And I'm the one showing that I'm not interested in him. Hahaha...silly me.
Now I can finally laugh at myself for being so foolish. Such a jerk man. How can I be such girl? So now that I know he's attached, yeah.. all the best to him! Wishing him to be happy always, now and forever. Really!! I really meant what I say ok.. not joking.. seriously..
Woah, 12 am sharp. not bad. Seems like it's a sad fairy tale story isn't it? haahz. LEt's make this private alrite? thank you.
Yay~ for me. Because I've finally moved on! Let's partyy baby~
And I'm calling for YOU baby. *winks*
And the story ends like this...period.
By: M i c [ H e L L ] e .
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