This is my..DeAth Note

●Dear● -Dead- ●Diary● ♥♥♥

This is a story of me, my life and my experience.
I'm MIcheLlE.
I am not held responsible for any forms of vulgar comments and personal opinions in this blog.
Read it at your own risk, by all means,
If you find it offensive and inappropriate,
Dear you, just simple, DON'T read.

~P.E.r.I.o.d~

(Thursday, October 6, 2011-)
+11:37 PM]*

# Sensitive.-

And so.. yes, I'm sensitive.

Not sure if that is good in a way, or bad - Well, what I meant by my sensitivity is.. I'm able to catch peoples feelings on each other.

Not that I'm always wanting to feel it, but I just felt it. Like my my close friend's friend, he likes a girl. But that girl has a boyfriend. There are no clue whatsoever about he liking her (I'm not close to this close friend's friend at all). Okaylah, I'll write down pseudonyms la..

Close friend's friend : W
Close friend : Y

Y had been taking to my other close friend about this issue, but well hidden from me. When I asked them what were they talking about, they avoided me and chatted else where. I was in a way pissed and in a way understand that it's people's secret and I should not intervene. So as an understanding friend, I ignored this secret and moved on. Somewhere along the way, I have no idea but to feel something... since that W is always in my lab, eventhough the girl he likes was not there.

So recently, I confronted the other close friend... like asking him so what's the secret that he hid from me previously.. he still don't wanna tell, but I told him I think I knew... so when I told him that there's something on between this two people, he said HOW YOU KNOW?? I was like, err, I don't know why, I just knew. -.-'' The only clue I got was : He made card for her, and he was there to celebrate my friend's birthday with that girl. But somehow, I just feel like it's more than just a friend gesture. LOL. Don't ask me why I felt that way or How I managed to feel, I just couldn't explain it in words. You may think like, hey, he just made a card, as a friend, it's normal.. or being present with the other girl in my close friend's bday, that is so normal... YAR, I can honestly tell you, it's super freaking normal.. BUT once again, I don't know how or why, I felt there's something between them!! Freaky!

So when he knew that I knew that friends secret already, he told me that my other friend too says that I'm able to feels people's gestures. I'm not sure about it, but it seems like.. I just... know..

Regardless, I've always been a shoulder to cry on, or borrowing ears to hear stories on relationship issues. Whenever I evaluate the boyfriend, I just honestly told my friends that either : He is trustable and you should move on with him (a keeper) OR He is quite a player and you should be careful ( just throw). Well, most of the time I'm right.

BUT..

As much as I want to advice them, it seems that it falls on to their deaf ears. Always. And then, they will come to me and cry ... saying that yeah, that guy was a jerk and such. (See, I told you so) But yeah, as a close friend, I'll just say oh okay, yeah a jerk ( I've already knew it so long ago, and it took you ages to know?) That said, MAYBE, yes, I do understand them... only a third person can see their identity.. as the one falling in love may be clouded with love... affection and maybe lust.. SO yes again, I understand...

AND...

I think I should just say no, I don't know, please don't ask me for advice.. Since nobody is listening anyway..what's the point of me talking so much when they don't even listen.. To be honest, I don't really like people asking a question when they : a) already had an answer in their mind
                                                                   b) love to oppose your suggestion in either options
                                                                   c) asking for the sake of asking


Finally, I'll just say up to you. I'm already so sick of debating with these kinda people. I've already given my input, and they wanna choose the other option that I didn't choose. So why bother to even ask me when you've already decided in your head? When you ask, do not oppose me. Just take it, and throw it afterwards. I hate it when people asking me should they choose A or B and when I chose A, they'll like err, but then A not good yada yada, and when I said okla, then B then.. and they'll like BUT B also not good and yada yada... and then finally chose B without much thinking. dots.

So.. in order to make me less pissed, please consider telling me all the pros and cons for both options first, and when I choose for you, take it. Say ok, I'll consider your input tq~. And when you've finally made your decision and it's not my choice, and explained to me why after much consideration, I'll accept it wholeheartedly, because I know afterall, it's YOUR decision. It's YOUR life.

That is the bad part of being sensitive. I've always knew I'm sensitive; but not until today I've realised that even people that I barely knew I can read their inner feelings.

Good or bad? I think it's bad.. no benefit la!

3 .deaths.
And the story ends like this...period.
By: M i c [ H e L L ] e .
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